Adventures of a Common Superhero

The Rescue -or- Just Another Day In The Life Of James Wildsides

We were having breakfast at Kenny & Zuke’s, when what should appear beyond the windows, at the corner of 11th and Stark?

A damsel in distress. Flat tire! Oh no! What will she do?

Leaving his breakfast behind, James rushed to scene. “Are you a superhero?” asked the damsel.

“Even better,” said James. “I’m a bike mechanic.”

Passersby watched with amazement. Inside the restaurant, diners hung on the edges of their seats, eyes transfixed. Gasps could be heard throughout the room. “Where did he come from? Does he always carry a pump with him? Look! He’s changing the tube without removing the tire from the wheel. How does he do that?!?!?!”

“Wow! You are better than a superhero.”

“That’s right.”

Don’t try this at home, kiddos.

Boo! Who?

For Halloween I became a raven

and stopped by the shop.

Kiddos in costumes fled through the doors, and the candy bowl was bottomless.

The customers were happy, as always.

For The Record

Hi, Friends.

Just in case there is any doubt about whether or not I am in fact a superhero,

I think you should know,

without a doubt,

I am.

As Witnessed At Starcrossed 2009

Is that a man wearing tinfoil undies?

No! It’s a robot wearing tinfoil undies.

And I am so totally in love.

The Kirkland Criterium

uBRDO sponsored the Kirkland Criterium. The weather had been horrible all week, but the sun came out and the streets dried just in time for the race. I came out to cheer and take photos.

The fans were on pins and needles.

uBRDO represented.

Racers got warm.

Coppers kept it cool.

I was supposed to take more pictures, but just as the famous Nick B. said when I spotted him on the sidelines, “I was supposed to race, but it’s too lovely of an afternoon.”

That and the beverages, of course.

Indeed it was a lovely afternoon. Hope to see you there next year. Look for me. I’ll be the one on the motorcycle.

Rules of the Road {According to Me} (Part 3)

Rule 3a: If you are going to sweat, slow down.

Rule 3b: If it is so hot that sweating will not be diminished no matter how slow you are pedaling, stop to drink lemonade in the shade.

Rule 3c: When you find yourself in a lemonade coma due to the fact that you consumed not one, not two, but three — yes three! — glasses of lemonade, lie in the grass under the trees and wait for the heat — and the coma — to pass.

Rule 3d: Follow the moon home.

So apparently there’s some big important bike event going on in France in which a bunch of cyclists get together and race each other through the mountains for days on end. Cascade Bicycle Club had a party to celebrate it. I stopped by.

The cutest kids on the planet were there, too. They gathered for a parade to show off their awesome biking skills. Please note, what the kids are partaking in here is a parade, not a race. The announcer said so about three billion times, “Kids! This is a parade. Not a race.”

And then, “Do you know the difference between a parade and a race? A parade is really, really slow.”

And then, “Hey kids, is this a parade or a race? I can’t hear you. Are we having a parade or a race?”

“A parade!!!!!!” a chorus of kiddy voices erupted, while sharp parent voices shouted from the sidelines, “Tyler. This is not a race. Do you hear me? Not! A! Race!”

Finally, satisfied that the kids fully understood the purpose of their gathering, the announcer prepared to let them loose. “3…2…1…Begin!”

Of course, the kiddos took off as fast as they could. It was all out, full on race.

After the fast past action on the streets, trials trickster Ryan Leech gave us a show.

Not only is he an amazing rider, he is a kind and humble and utterly gracious guy.

Right on, Ryan!

There were also street sprints and raffles and music and food and bike lovers of all sorts.

When the sun went down, they put up a huge outdoor cinema screen to watch that French cycling event. Sad to report, I didn’t stick around to learn what the hype is all about. Having indulged happily in beer and hot dogs and with a substantial, dark ride ahead, I began my homeward bound tour instead.